AACS

02 E9 18 02 9D F4 E3 5A D8 61 56 C8 6A B6 88 CC

these numbers came to me in a dream ...

Pay Day

Phew! I've just sweated and toiled through four months at my old workplace of Moregrief-Handsdown, the premier stockbroking company in the UK. Just my luck we happened to have three bloody heatwaves while I was there, ... and no air-conditioning.

Still, it was worth it in the end coz I made myself a cool £40,000 while I was there. And to think it used to take me a whole year to earn nearly that amount.

Shame I didn't get a few more months out of it, even a year. Heck, that would've put me in the same bracket as Dwayne Kelly. Now there's a thought ...

Silly Girl

I'd just like to point out that yesterday's cunning plan was thought up while listening to my pirate copy of Corinne Bailey Rae, which must be the girliest music ever. This can't be right - there must be subliminal messages or something in it making me do these things.
Anyway, my cunning plan failed to work because Dwayne Kelly decided to have a banana for breakfast instead. He's such a tubby little fellow, I don't know why he does it. It's the beer he needs to cut back on.
So I ended up taking out some of the web team by accident. Still, the company's web site is looking pretty trippy.

Oh, and a message for you AcuBolox - stop posting rubbish comments on my blog ! Never trust a man who keeps a cat, my wise old granny used to say ....

Colour Me Bad

Hey there! wow it's been quite a while since I last posted something on here. Sorry about that - but I've been a bit distracted of late. You see, I've gone and got myself a job. Yeah damn right! i've plugged back into the matrix and i'm doing the 9-to-5 shuffle ... well, it's more like 8-to-5.30 but that's not the point.
And that's not all. I'm actually back working at the place I used to be before I got PISTD (post-IT stress trauma disorder, remember?). All the old faces are still there, and a few new ones too.
So what's it all about? well, this time I'm gonna make them give me a job in HR. I came up with a cunning plan this evening, to make some chocolate muffins and put in a few of my "special" ingredients. I'm gonna bring them in tomorrow and dish them out to the lads, then sit back and watch the show! Pretty soon those boys are gonna be chillin' like it was 1969.
It's a bit like the scene with the blue pill and the red pill in the Matrix, but this time they don't get a choice - they're getting the red pill and coming out of the matrix whether they like it or not.    he he he :)
Hopefully they don't read this before I dish out the cookies or my plan will backfire and it'll be me getting kicked out of the matrix instead.

Fear My Intellect

It's always good to discover something new about yourself and today I have learned that I am a genius. That's right - a real mind-melder.

You can find out whether you're fit to read my intellectual blog by taking the test here ... link.

And if you fail then you will understand why this blog never made any sense to you - because you're stupid. Remember, you have to do the test off the top of your head, no cheating with google or stuff like that.

Of course my old boss Dwain Kelly always said I was a genius at avoiding work, but I thought he was just being sarcastic. Little did I know he had spotted some real genius potential in me. Why he didn't put me in charge of HR I'll never know ?!

By the way, my score was 24 of 33. Now I just need to learn to be evil and I will be a proper evil genius and can hold the world to ransom, to pay for my next holiday. Beware ...

Homeless Bob again

I got a message from Homeless Bob the other day. He wanted everyone to know that he wouldn't be homeless for much longer. In fact he was meant to move into his new home last weekend (and this is not the first time he's said that). But he made a mistake when he hired Injury-Lawyers-4-U to do the conveyancing on his new home. So it looks like Homeless Bob will be living in cardboard city for a while longer.

I am Batman

I did a quiz today to find out what kind of superhero I would be. Here it is if you want to try it yourself ... link

• Batman

  92%




• Indiana Jones

  75%




• Spiderman

  75%




• Lara Croft

  71%




• Neo

  67%




• Capt Jack Sparrow

  67%




• James Bond 007

  58%




• William Wallace

  54%




• El Zorro

  42%




• Maximus

  42%




• The Terminator

  33%